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Theres only two ways to argue with a woman and neither one of them works.

Wheel and Alex

Anarchy! I say! Anarchy!! That's what would happen if Alex Trebec had a frosty beverage with Pat Sajak? While Conway Twitty jammed with Sid Vicius and Ted Nugent, on a stage, constructed of Oreo cookies and Gene Simmons pubic hair. All the while Bohemian Monks are chanting " Fidel Castro is a fan of croquet and reese cups !!"

Tree sound

Hey Doug bear!!! If a tree falls on a deaf person and nobody is around to hear the screams of pain and agony. does the tree and deaf person make a noise?

My Son's view family holidays

ITS BEEN A VERY NORMAL THANKSGIVING EATING GREAT FOOD, GETTING OVERLY STUFFED, VIDEO GAMES WITH MATTHEW, AND MOM AND AUNTS CUSSING AT EACH OTHER AND MY DAD SITTING THERE LAUGHING THEN MY MOM GETTING MAD AT HIM THEN I LAUGH AND I GET IN TROUBLE THEN HE LAUGHS AND GETS IN TROUBLE AND THE CYCLE REPEATS

Second Shot

I wonder if he had to do it all over again, would Adam take that bite or skip the snack , just curl up for a nap and have God jerk out another rib. It seems to me God had an alternative plan just in case. I mean, Adam had a few more ribs in there. What would it have hurt for a second shot. But then being of the male persuasion, you just know he would sneak out of the garden once in awhile.

Scary Night

The only thing that ever frightens me is closing my eyes and feeling a strange hand on my genitals. That and a seven headed chartroose mountain lion, married to an ostrich that plays a banjo and eats fruit roll ups for breakfast and wears a burt Reynolds mask to hide his shame. So before I go to bed at night I coat myself with a sticky glaze made from, Rasberry jello, the eyebrow hairs trimmed from Andy Rooney and ellen Barken. mixed in a bowl, purchased from a large man, with one arm and seven fingers, for a photo of Joe Cary chasing ducks in his under wear. Then and only then do I feel safe, from the demons in my brother John's head.

Training

I wouldn't stake my life on it, but I believe. If I had to, I could train a falcon to make jello and brush a horse. The skills I have gained through out my years as a ,secret agent Beawolfe, in the jungles of Nambia. While serving the Vice... Lord of the Tuku Mimby tribe. Have put me into a state of false security. Some times I wonder what if? Then I remember to wear my Authentic Chuck Taylors and scarlett jock strap in case of an attack. This will enable me to jump higher and swing faster, than any rabid spider monkey and his wallabee comrades. If you don't hear from me in the morn, I shall be in the widerness gathering berries and used transmission oil for a signal fire. This will thwart off evil Gerbles and box turtles from over taxing our farm lands and bussines ventures. They must be stopped at all costs and sent to the senate, for better benefits and salaries, so to better understand the American worker and his needs. Now I realise this is a silly post. But not really any more silly than Congress pretending to care about the American Worker, for yet another Year.